Example: My boyfriend and I were just playing MarioKart, he was losing. So he decided to quit racing, just put down his controller and complain that the course that I picked was too hard. So I said fine, I'll play alone, quit the race and selected one player. What does he do? Turns off the Wii. I know, right? How old are we? So, I walk away to read the paper online. If he want to pout and act like a 5 year old, he can, alone.
About 20 mins. later, he appears in the dining room and says "I'm sorry I was a jerk about Mario." What do I say? "It's ok" WHAT?!?! I mean I could have said yes you were, thanks for apologizing, or thanks for admitting it, or any number of things that weren't "It's Ok".
Because the fact of the matter is it's not ok, and I don't feel like it's ok, and I sure as hell don't want him thinking it's ok. (Which for the record, he said no it's not) But that's not the point. The point is, why am I going around telling people that their poor behavior is ok?
At some point in my life, did I develop this, let people walk all over you, as long as they make an effort to realize that they're wrong mentality? Give them a don't go to jail card as long as they made an effort? I don't know if at some point, I decided everything was just ok. But it's not going to be ok anymore. I'm really going to have to make a conscious decision to think about the words that come out of my mouth.
You know, I notice this in other situations. Sometimes, it's even funny (in a did that just happen kind of way.) Like the times that you're in the grocery store and someone says I'm sorry, but I'm just going to get right in here and get in your way, stand right in front of you when you're looking for something. I mean it's ok because I said I was sorry first. Or when someone is like "you know I'm not racist or anything" but, and then makes some blatantly racist comment. It's like hey wait just one second here, you just said that you weren't racist, but as long as everyone know's that you're not, it's ok to slam people of other races. WHAT?!?! No, guess what? It's still not ok!
Or like the times that that someone is like I'm sorry, I'm not trying to be mean, or rude but ________ (insert comment of choice here) I had a neighbor do that to me just recently. I was pulling into the neighborhood and she came outside and said, "You know, I'm not trying to bitch, but you really need to slow down." Well clearly you are trying to bitch woman. Perhaps your bitchiness is warranted. Perhaps someone needed to bring it to my attention that I drive to fast. And the next time your dog wakes me up at 6am with his barking, I'll be sure to bring it to your attention. And I am trying to bitch.
If you have something to say, and you feel strongly about it, then just say it. If you are comfortable enough in your own opinions, then you don't need to preface your remarks by saying hey I'm gonna hurt your feelings here, so just bear with me.
I'm not the only person I've seen demonstrate this type of behavior, saying everything is ok, when it's just not. When did we, as the public, decide it was not socially acceptable to spare other's feeling when they were the ones in the wrong? I don't get it, and from now on, I'm going to make an effort to eradicate this type of behavior and encourage other's to do it as well.
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