Actual conversation taking place in my office:
New Guy 1: Yeah, I'm taking next week off to go get married, bite the bullet, I guess
Intern: Yeah, its about time, I guess.
New Guy 1: Yeah, I mean we've been together about three years, we've both left and come back and pushed every button we have and thoroughly pissed each other off, so I guess this is next.
Intern: Well I guess, yeah, good luck with that man.
**New Guy walks to my office**
New Guy 1: I'm taking off for the weekend, gonna hit the bottle and tomorrow go fishing and perhaps to the casino.
Me: Wow, its uh, 2:30 have fun though. Don't loose it all at the casino.
New Guy 1: Can't afford to lose more than $25, won't be able to get married next week.
**New Guy on phone with To be wife**
Well I though you'd like if i asked you about your day, i mean we are getting married arent we?
Thank you sir for giving me so much insight to how your mind works. Good thing the per plate cost to your reception is $7.00 because it doesnt really sound like you're into this marriage thing anyway. I'm so glad that this is not my life. :)
Friday, June 5, 2009
My Favorite Things- Earth Day Edition
Alright people I know I'm a little late for the Earth Day blog edition, but I was thinking of some of my favorite things earlier, and it just so happened that two of them are super environmentally friendly and I'd though I'd share, so you too can do you're part for the environment.
The first product is the Kleen Kanteen. 
The kanteen is one of my favorite products because not only is it good for you (less plastics consumption) we've all heard about the BPA's in plastic bottles, its also good for the environment. And, its lightweight. Also, its great because if you just carry it around, take it to work or the gym, it easy to get your daily recommended water intake for the day. If you purchase the 27 ounce size, that's 2.3 per day! As far as I know, the Kleen Kanteen is only available online, but well worth the shipping and handling.
The kanteen is one of my favorite products because not only is it good for you (less plastics consumption) we've all heard about the BPA's in plastic bottles, its also good for the environment. And, its lightweight. Also, its great because if you just carry it around, take it to work or the gym, it easy to get your daily recommended water intake for the day. If you purchase the 27 ounce size, that's 2.3 per day! As far as I know, the Kleen Kanteen is only available online, but well worth the shipping and handling.Next on the list is My Chico Bag. 
The Chico bag is super fantastic because I am a person who tries to use less plastic bags at the grocery, drugstore etc, and it seems that I have a reusable bag from almost ever establishment in town, but once I use them, I take them in the house to unload my goods, and the bag rarely make it back to my car. Now with the Chico bag, it stays in my purse, because not only is in a bag, its also its own holder. So, you're at the store, you get it out, unfold it, take it home, unpack, refold and place back in your purse. Genius. Mine is Pink fyi! :) Also, unlike the Kleen Kanteen, you can purchase the Chico bag in stores, like Whole Foods and Earth Fare.
The Chico bag is super fantastic because I am a person who tries to use less plastic bags at the grocery, drugstore etc, and it seems that I have a reusable bag from almost ever establishment in town, but once I use them, I take them in the house to unload my goods, and the bag rarely make it back to my car. Now with the Chico bag, it stays in my purse, because not only is in a bag, its also its own holder. So, you're at the store, you get it out, unfold it, take it home, unpack, refold and place back in your purse. Genius. Mine is Pink fyi! :) Also, unlike the Kleen Kanteen, you can purchase the Chico bag in stores, like Whole Foods and Earth Fare.Third, and not one of my favorite products, but a great way to help reduce your carbon footprint, the compact florescent light bulb. 
These bulbs use up to 75% less energy and can last up to 10 times longer than standard incandescent bulbs. Although the bulbs are initially more expensive, they will save money on you're electric bill. Also, if you buy the multi pack at Sam's Club or BJ's, the initial price isn't that much higher than regular light bulbs.
These bulbs use up to 75% less energy and can last up to 10 times longer than standard incandescent bulbs. Although the bulbs are initially more expensive, they will save money on you're electric bill. Also, if you buy the multi pack at Sam's Club or BJ's, the initial price isn't that much higher than regular light bulbs. Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Noisey, Rude Neighbors
I'm relatively easy to get along with, I'm relatively easy to live with or near, but I don't know what has gotten into the water in my apartment building because I've never seen a group or more loud or more rude neighbors in my almost two years in this building. And its the same people, and it just recently that their behavior has changed. We have a family that lives on the bottom floor, back corner, and it just so happens that their garage is on the side of the building, right next to ours. Our driveways are combined, and next to their garage is a set of parking spots, followed by a wooded area. Great place to let your kids play in the afternoon, weekends, out of the beaten path, only really accessed by our two apartments.
Great place to let your kids play, (you're 4 and 6 year olds) if you're supervising them. If you're paying attention to what they're doing, and where they're running around to, and paying attention to who else may be trying to go about their daily activities. Lets take last Saturday for example, I had several errands to run so i get ready for the day and proceed down to my car. The kids are out playing, the parents are sitting in lawn chairs in the garage and all of the kids toys are behind my car. SO, I start moving them so that I can leave. The four year old asks what I'm doing, and the rest of them just stare at me. I get in my car, hoping that the parents will tell their child to go in the garage or just stay put, as to not run behind my car, but since they just stare at me, I tell him to stay where he is until I leave. RUDE.
So, this week, the neighbors have decided that since we very rarely use our garage spot, they will instead. Excuse me, do you pay for that spot? Do you not have ample parking spots on the other side of your garage. I may not always park behind my garage, but when I come home past 10pm its usually the only spot open, unless its, oh say filled with your car! RUDE.
The final straw, and don't even get me started on their ST Bernard Puppy, who is not a puppy at all weighing in at 50 lbs, soon to be 250 when full grown. News Flash: You live in an apartment with four people, another dog and at least one cat. Anyhow, the final straw, I'm on my way to work Saturday night, and said neighbors are on their way home from the pool. Children are on one side of the parking lot, adults on the other. Child hears my car and about one car length in front of it, runs across to his parents, but stops about midway across. I slam on brakes, mom throws her hands up in the air at me, (please!) and then proceeds to yell at child and give me a dirty look and I drive by. RUDE.
Last night, our other neighbors, for the fourth night in a row have decided at 2 am, 3 am, 10pm or whenever, its slow jam time. And by slow jam i mean really old slow rap songs like boys to men ballads and whatnot, at ridiculous volumes that shake my floor and make me feel like I'm live in the front row. One time, two times this happens, occasionally, I'll ignore it, get annoyed, but ignore it. It happens every day, totally different story. When I knocked on their door last night to ask them to keep it down, they did not answer, probably couldn't hear me. We'll see what they have to say about the note I left them today.
Great place to let your kids play, (you're 4 and 6 year olds) if you're supervising them. If you're paying attention to what they're doing, and where they're running around to, and paying attention to who else may be trying to go about their daily activities. Lets take last Saturday for example, I had several errands to run so i get ready for the day and proceed down to my car. The kids are out playing, the parents are sitting in lawn chairs in the garage and all of the kids toys are behind my car. SO, I start moving them so that I can leave. The four year old asks what I'm doing, and the rest of them just stare at me. I get in my car, hoping that the parents will tell their child to go in the garage or just stay put, as to not run behind my car, but since they just stare at me, I tell him to stay where he is until I leave. RUDE.
So, this week, the neighbors have decided that since we very rarely use our garage spot, they will instead. Excuse me, do you pay for that spot? Do you not have ample parking spots on the other side of your garage. I may not always park behind my garage, but when I come home past 10pm its usually the only spot open, unless its, oh say filled with your car! RUDE.
The final straw, and don't even get me started on their ST Bernard Puppy, who is not a puppy at all weighing in at 50 lbs, soon to be 250 when full grown. News Flash: You live in an apartment with four people, another dog and at least one cat. Anyhow, the final straw, I'm on my way to work Saturday night, and said neighbors are on their way home from the pool. Children are on one side of the parking lot, adults on the other. Child hears my car and about one car length in front of it, runs across to his parents, but stops about midway across. I slam on brakes, mom throws her hands up in the air at me, (please!) and then proceeds to yell at child and give me a dirty look and I drive by. RUDE.
Last night, our other neighbors, for the fourth night in a row have decided at 2 am, 3 am, 10pm or whenever, its slow jam time. And by slow jam i mean really old slow rap songs like boys to men ballads and whatnot, at ridiculous volumes that shake my floor and make me feel like I'm live in the front row. One time, two times this happens, occasionally, I'll ignore it, get annoyed, but ignore it. It happens every day, totally different story. When I knocked on their door last night to ask them to keep it down, they did not answer, probably couldn't hear me. We'll see what they have to say about the note I left them today.
Happy Quarter Century to Me
So my 25th birthday was last week. It was a joyous occasion. Many people helped me celebrate, many cakes were made and all around it was very memorable. 25 is that age that starts making you think. Some of my life goals include marriage and children. I would like to have children sooner than later, and I'd also like to be alive to celebrate lots of wedding anniversaries, so with each passing birthday, i have a momentary though to my biological clock. I'm OK with the fact that marriage is not on my current horizon, I'm OK with the fact that my life has worked out the way it has and I'm currently single. What I'm not OK with, is other people not being OK with this fact. I have a lot of friends, the majority age 24-30ish, and the majority also single. So I wonder why it is that people in their 50-60's are so concerned with the relationship status of my generation. On this note, I will share my most amusing and also insulting birthday present received via email. A woman I work with, late 50's, emailed me: Subject line: Happy Birthday and here is your present. Body of email: A link and screen shot of the Christian Singles Dating Website. I could just leave it at that, but I'm not going to.
Clearly, this woman doesn't know me, not that I'm anti-religion or anything, but for all she knows, I could be Jewish, or perhaps Hindu, or a Jehovah's Wittiness. Second of all, for all this woman knows, I'm not single. I rarely ever talk to her, let alone about my relationship status. Does one need to run around the office sharing stories of her relationship to perfect strangers so they don't send her dating web site links? Now I can appreciate this woman's though that I would apparently be much happier and better off if I met the man of my dreams via said website, but I couldn't help to think that her motives were less happiness of others and more judgy mcjudgerson about my single status.
Clearly, this woman doesn't know me, not that I'm anti-religion or anything, but for all she knows, I could be Jewish, or perhaps Hindu, or a Jehovah's Wittiness. Second of all, for all this woman knows, I'm not single. I rarely ever talk to her, let alone about my relationship status. Does one need to run around the office sharing stories of her relationship to perfect strangers so they don't send her dating web site links? Now I can appreciate this woman's though that I would apparently be much happier and better off if I met the man of my dreams via said website, but I couldn't help to think that her motives were less happiness of others and more judgy mcjudgerson about my single status.
Random Tidbits
Here's one thing I've never understood: You're in an elevator, elevator stops on another floor then where you caught it, person gets in, looks at you and apologizes. This has happened to to me twice this week, and its only Wednesday. Do I look like I'm upset that you're sharing my public elevator? Am I just intimidating in general, or are you just weird?
So I'm at the grocery store the other day, its probally about 12:30. There is a completly obnoxious doorbell like sound that I hear several times a minute that i'm in the store. Its so loud that I jump when it happens, so I grab what i need and head to the checkout. Upon inquiry of this rather annoying sound, the cashier procedes to tell me its the warning system that someone has come in the store, and its only used between 11:00 and 5:30 am. News Flash: The cashier is standing approximitly 10 feet from the only entrance and exit, and there is a policeman outside the door. So i say to this girl, can't you just turn it off when you're upfront here and turn it back on when you leave your register, because i dont know how you stand it. Her response to me, "what grocery store do you work at?" Still don't get it.
So I'm at the grocery store the other day, its probally about 12:30. There is a completly obnoxious doorbell like sound that I hear several times a minute that i'm in the store. Its so loud that I jump when it happens, so I grab what i need and head to the checkout. Upon inquiry of this rather annoying sound, the cashier procedes to tell me its the warning system that someone has come in the store, and its only used between 11:00 and 5:30 am. News Flash: The cashier is standing approximitly 10 feet from the only entrance and exit, and there is a policeman outside the door. So i say to this girl, can't you just turn it off when you're upfront here and turn it back on when you leave your register, because i dont know how you stand it. Her response to me, "what grocery store do you work at?" Still don't get it.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Catch me if you Can
I was traveling home Sunday afternoon and listening to my NPR podcasts in the car. I enjoy a wide range of podcasts from NPR, but one of my favorites is Wait, Wait, Don't tell me! It a great hour long weekly current events quiz show hosted by Peter Sagel, out of Chicago. I highly recommend that you check out their podcast here: http://www.npr.org/programs/waitwait/index.html. You'll learn something and be amused at the same time. Ok, enough plugging the show, back to my point.
One of the questions they asked was: what new product contains a gps tracking device that has some womens rights groups outraged? This was an episode from November, so perhaps you've all heard of this, but the answer is lingerie. To this I say, Really? I find this disturbing on several levels. The line is called Catch me if you Can, and comes from Lucia Lorio, a designer in Brazil. The designer says that the reason for the GPS is "'In London, New York, Rio de Janiero - wherever there is danger, the underwear may prove to be a lifesaver." I'm sorry, but no. First of all, unless you're giving the lingerie out to prostitutes, what average woman wears her lingerie around town running errands, or better yet to work or a night out? In the bedroom, and on the floor, where proper lingerie belongs, there is no need for GPS. I also question the women right's groups who are calling this invention a modern day chasity belt. Any women who is dumb enough to wear lingerie with GPS attached to it to cheat on her boyfriend/husband should be caught. This whole concept is redicilous. Especially when the going rate for the two piece set is 500 euro, 700 euro for the advanced model. If you pay the extra 200 euro, will your lingerie drive you home too?
One of the questions they asked was: what new product contains a gps tracking device that has some womens rights groups outraged? This was an episode from November, so perhaps you've all heard of this, but the answer is lingerie. To this I say, Really? I find this disturbing on several levels. The line is called Catch me if you Can, and comes from Lucia Lorio, a designer in Brazil. The designer says that the reason for the GPS is "'In London, New York, Rio de Janiero - wherever there is danger, the underwear may prove to be a lifesaver." I'm sorry, but no. First of all, unless you're giving the lingerie out to prostitutes, what average woman wears her lingerie around town running errands, or better yet to work or a night out? In the bedroom, and on the floor, where proper lingerie belongs, there is no need for GPS. I also question the women right's groups who are calling this invention a modern day chasity belt. Any women who is dumb enough to wear lingerie with GPS attached to it to cheat on her boyfriend/husband should be caught. This whole concept is redicilous. Especially when the going rate for the two piece set is 500 euro, 700 euro for the advanced model. If you pay the extra 200 euro, will your lingerie drive you home too?
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Bored in Ohio: Travel Channel Edition
On my recent trip from Charlotte to North Canton, i traveled through North Carolina, Virginia, West Virginia, and Ohio. Along the way, I passed many the tourist spot (according to the makers of those fine brown highway signs). 
if it was indeed, worth all fuss. What I found inside was a glorified gift shop, along with cafeteria, theatre for local plays and artist's showcases where you could watch a glass blower or violin maker at work. Its actually a nice little operation that they run there, but i do question why this glorious place is located on the side of the turnpike. But, we are talking about the West Virginians here, so go figure.
Big Muskie Bucket. Every time I pass the sign that says Big Muskie Bucket, i ask myself, what the hell is that? So, i've devoted the rest of this post to informing all of my fine readers what lies 16 miles west of I-77, in Caldwell, Ohio. The bucket is the centerpiece of miner's memorial park in southern ohio. Its the world's largest dragline and one of the seven engineering wonders of the world. Who knew that such wonders lye less than two hours south from my hometown? Well, you, my faithful readers are in for a treat, here in my blog, you will find a sneak peak of Ohio's own, muskie bucket! Here it is, in all of its mining glory. It weighs 460,000 lbs empty and 640,000 when full. If anyone has actually visited this attraction, please let me know. If you haven't you should now feel like you don't need to! You're welcome!
The Glory that is: West Virginia's Finest
The Tamarack!
Among the most notable was of course: The Tamarack, West Virginia's finest. For the amount of money spend to advertise this local wonder, located smack dab in the center of the West Virginia turnpike, behind a rest stop and gas station, one would think that this was the center of West Virginia society. Things like Social events, fundraisers, charity auctions, and luncheons must be among the everyday happenings at this artist's mecca on the side of highway 77. I did stop at the Tamarack once, just to see
if it was indeed, worth all fuss. What I found inside was a glorified gift shop, along with cafeteria, theatre for local plays and artist's showcases where you could watch a glass blower or violin maker at work. Its actually a nice little operation that they run there, but i do question why this glorious place is located on the side of the turnpike. But, we are talking about the West Virginians here, so go figure. Picture of me, outside the tamarack
**I'm sorry, if anyone is offended by my attitude towards WV, i'm sure you're a fine state filled with fine people, that i have yet to run into. Perhaps I should venture off the turnpike and into your small towns**
The other most notable tourist attraction comes in southern ohio, near nobel county.
Big Muskie Bucket. Every time I pass the sign that says Big Muskie Bucket, i ask myself, what the hell is that? So, i've devoted the rest of this post to informing all of my fine readers what lies 16 miles west of I-77, in Caldwell, Ohio. The bucket is the centerpiece of miner's memorial park in southern ohio. Its the world's largest dragline and one of the seven engineering wonders of the world. Who knew that such wonders lye less than two hours south from my hometown? Well, you, my faithful readers are in for a treat, here in my blog, you will find a sneak peak of Ohio's own, muskie bucket! Here it is, in all of its mining glory. It weighs 460,000 lbs empty and 640,000 when full. If anyone has actually visited this attraction, please let me know. If you haven't you should now feel like you don't need to! You're welcome!
So, as some of you know, my best friend's step-dad passed away from cancer this past week. I'm been friends with her for quite some time now, and know her family, so i made the trip from Charlotte to North Canton for the funeral this weekend. The general reason for this trip was rather depressing, but it did yield some rather entertaining travel stories.
1) i stopped off on two different exits to search for the A&W Root beer stand that was advertised on the side of the highway. Perhaps they should take some of the city stimulus money and update their signs, because i found no said root beer stand. TWICE! But I did find a Dunkin Donuts iced coffee, so my world once again felt right.
2) Next stop was Princeton, West Virginia, where i stopped at the local BP for gas. Let me tell you, i'm not a huge fan of WV. Not to mention, they really pissed me off when they recently changed their state motto from Open for Business to Wild and Wonderful. Princeton really also needs to campaign for some stimulus money because their gas stations do not have pay at the pump service. I didn't even know this was an option. But its really annoying, because you have to walk in, give mr. mountain man "something to hold on to" in this case, my car keys, and then go pump and walk back in to pay. Annoying!
3) Right outside of charleston, WV, i found myself in need of a bathroom and food. So, I stopped at a gas station/subway. EWW, but you gotta do what you gotta do. But, I'm glad I stopped because I encountered the most retarded subway employees of all time! Let me set the scene, there are 4 people in line, and 2 people working the counter. Its 7pm. They're out of bread, imagine that, a subway out of bread. But, then the other worker points out that they do have 3 footlong pieces of honey wheat left. So lucky for me, im the 3 person in line. So i get my sub and i'm approaching the cash register when crazy west Virginia women comes running in the door and throws herself in front of me. With the most southern accent i've ever heard,
she says, "i need an application. I see you're hiring. Can you please give me a job?"
subway employee- "yeah, we're a real shorthanded right now, its just me and her working all basically all the shifts, but we're getting ready to hire four people probably tomorrow, so get your application in soon."
unemployed woman- "i live 5 miles down the road, i'm available at all times of the day, i need a job real bad, can i speak with the manager?"
subway employee- "i'm the assistant manager, but our hiring goes through our regional manager, you'll have to call her.
unemployed woman- whats her name?
subway employee- her name is sue, um, her last name is smith, no wait that was my last name when i was married this last time, her last name is jones. no wait thats not it, i dont know her name. (i mean shes only your boss)
unemployed woman leaves with promise of returning application in the early am, and subway employee goes, wow, i like her, she really made a good impression.
Me- still waiting to pay for my sub. I shall never return to that subway.
I wish I could make a living on people watching. I'm at Panera with JB right now, and the most annoying girl i've ever encountered is working the counter. Yesterday was her birthday, and she has a big order coming in. She's also VERY excited that today is valentines day, as she is wishing it to everyone who comes through her line. Wow, that roof is red.
There are a man and woman at the table next to us, and I'm not quite sure on the dynamic of their relationship, but if this is an outing with romantic intentions, dude may want to stop referencing his ex-wife, and what she expected out of him. I wonder if they can see my computer screen because there was suddenly a very long, very awkward pause.
To my left, there is an older gentleman who is talking on his cell phone while eating his pick two. He made a trip to Wooster this morning and found out the answer to a question that i've been asking my entire life. Do you want to know what an amish man wife buys his wife for valentine's day? A corn scoop. He found this information so pertinent that he called his loved on on the phone to tell them about it. WOW. Welcome to Ohio.
The women at the table behind me are talking about their children and their very demanding Jackson soccer coaches. You really should hear this, because they're talking about it like its life and death situation here. Very intense.
Well, loyal blog readers, (population- me) that is all for now.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Welcome to My Blog
I've never tried out the whole blogging thing, but apparently it is the thing to do. I find my self to be rather entertaining, so i figure that some of you may also. And if noone else ever reads this, well that would be sad. And also kind of funny.
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